BJs, Regret & Leftover Domino’s

stormtrooper_regret_by_unicron_planet_eater

Enter Kid Jr. (Actually it never got THAT far).

Nothing I’ve been a part of in the last year and a half has been at all simple or uncomplicated. It started with the break-up with Lilith, followed by The Kid, followed by The Dentist. There was also Kid Jr. In an alternate universe (and to be honest there are times where I actually believe in this; perhaps it is because I’m so into superheroes and those kinds of storylines), Kid Jr. would have actually been The Kid. I started talking to him online at some point in the summer after Awkward HJ (I think) but we never met because I was so nervous. He kept wanting me to come to his office where he had an on-campus job and to well… I’m sure you know where that is going? If you don’t then I apologize that you somehow found yourself on this blog. We sort of stopped talking for some reason and then I met The Kid.

So very early on, The Dentist told me I should “talk to other guys” as part of his “don’t get attached” warning. I obviously listened to all of this…not. I did say that I was not really interested in having multiple people going on at once, though. Cut to one Saturday while I was at home feeling very under the weather due to a very bad ass sinus infection I found myself online and Kid Jr. was there as well. I’m not sure what The Dentist was up to at this point, it might have been the weekend that the boyfriend visited but I was feeling very lonely, and to be honest I was lonely even with The Dentist because I had fallen for him and thought I couldn’t have him.

I also missed The Kid. That banter was so good (as I may have mentioned once or twice). Kid Jr. was also clever, shared a love of Kanye as well and had some very good banter skills. As we talked that day, I realized something, Kid Jr. was very much reminding me of The Kid. We were talking back and forth about what we had been up to since we last chatted though I decided to leave out details about The Dentist. He told me that he ran a half marathon which was impressive. I asked him what he did to celebrate after and he told me he went out for a burger with a friend. WENT OUT FOR A BURGER WITH A FRIEND. Did I mention the part where The Kid had told me he went for a burger and a beer with a friend who just ran a race back when we were talking and the dodging was in its early stages? Same restaurant. I wasn’t entirely sure but Kid Jr. knew The Kid. What. The. Actual. Fuck?

I thought to myself that this needed to stop. It was hitting too close to home. But again, I was lonely and the conversation was easy. I didn’t want to tell him about The Kid or The Dentist. We kept talking and exchanged phone numbers and he broached the topic of wanting to meet. I had my reservations here. I didn’t want to hurt him and I didn’t want him to judge me if I told him about The Dentist. At one point, there was the talk of actually going out for food which I guess would have been my first official “date” with a bro.  I was talking to him every day and for much of the day. We kept dancing around the idea of meeting but I kept canceling or chickening out. One night he texted me while I was at The Dentist’s and said he was lonely and wished we could hang and all I responded with was “Sorry, I’m busy.”

The Dentist went home for Christmas and he just stopped talking to me. I went home for Christmas and kept talking to Kid Jr. He was putting in work trying to get me to meet him. So much so that he was willing to drive an hour to come see me and also took my resume and jazzed it up in a new and better format, all while he was packing and gearing up to spend a semester in England. It even came out that we both knew The Kid which caused an awkward text exchange but we got over that too. My plan for Christmas break was to start my new life as a “Jedi In Exile”. Relationships were not working for me and I was tired of being left feeling sad and worthless and lonely. I would stop this by stopping the pursuit of sex and companionship (and perhaps double down on the pizza to fill the void).

The whole Jedi In Exile thing was not working out because I spent my days Facebook creeping The Dentist (even though we weren’t friends so I couldn’t see much of his profile) because I kept fearing that he was going to get engaged over Christmas as well as writing The Kid. So because of this stupid loneliness, I continued to talk to Kid Jr.  When I finally returned to the city from my parents’ house, I decided that it was time to meet. At this point, it had been two weeks since I heard from The Dentist so I was convinced he had forgotten about me.

So on the first Saturday of the New Year, Kid Jr. was on his way to my place. As I’m waiting for him and feeling nervous as I always do when I’m about to get naked and fool around with someone new and my phone goes off. Guess who? The motherfucking Dentist. “Hey. I’m at the airport now and headed back. Sorry, I ignored you, but you knew I would do that. Hope to see you soon.” WHAT?! After two weeks of unanswered messages, I get this!

The message threw me off and so I was already out of it. Then, Kid Jr. shows up, parks where he isn’t supposed to and enters my building through the wrong door. Oh, and he is a real bitch in person. His voice is a  bit annoying, and the bitchiness continues. The clothes came off though and we went at it. That was kind of disappointing as well. Something was off and I think part of it was that we both wanted to be in control (Oh and he wasn’t The Kid in person, just kind of in text and he certainly wasn’t The Dentist). He also kind of sucked. Not in a good way. Like in a real sort of sloppy way. (Again, I was kind of ruined by The Dentist because that boy can S a D like nobody’s business).

So it all ended, and he left. I felt awkward and kind of regretted the whole thing, especially now that I knew The Dentist was on his way back to town and wanted to see me. So I sat there alone, eating leftover Domino’s that I actually burned and regretted my choices.

I really thought this would be a very clean break here since Kid Jr. was leaving in a few days but he kept writing me as he was homesick and his family hadn’t gotten Skype yet. Thankfully it didn’t continue as I didn’t want to complicate things further, but we did chat a bit over the next few months. Again, I can’t do simple and uncomplicated remember?

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